Another Post That’s None of my Business

The Writing Rag is a grammar blog, but this post is about drawing, a topic I really have no cause to comment on or complain about, because I frequently use comics for illustrations, and most comics are more caricature than realistic. Still, this caught my attention.

Their house must be paper thin! Ever try to hug someone through separate windows, around the mullion? And how was she able to reach his chest?

At least they got apostrophe correct on neighbors’.

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This is an example of a misplaced modifier. Modifiers should go as close to what they modify as you can put them.

The leaves are not for parties and weddings, the confetti is for parties and weddings, so “for parties and weddings” should come right after “confetti.” Okay, maybe this is a really minor solecism, but hey, I’m a curmudgeon. Harrumpf!

You might remember this from sixth grade (thank you, Mrs Clemens).

• Use “may” when you ask permission.
• Use “can” when you’re talking about ability.

…and therein lies the basis for the humor:

Yes, we break this rule a lot, especially since people use “may” when they mean “might.” I recommend you don’t so that. In fact, don’t do either!

You might know this joke:

A guy visits the doctor’s office and has an examination.

Doctor: Looks like you have a henweigh.

Patient: What’s a henweigh?

Doctor: Oh, about five or six pounds.

If you don’t know the joke, it might take a second to get it. The humor hinges on the meaning of the contraction apostrophe s, which the patient uses to mean “what is” and the doctor deliberately takes it to mean “what does.”

Ambiguous contractions aren’t common, but they happen, so watch out.

Feel free to put any that come to mind in the comments.

Well, technically they’re unnecessary (aka redundant), but maybe not, given the context. We can use extra words for emphasis even though the words aren’t actually necessary.

I think “at this time” is also unnecessary…