Looking for a Writing Job?

Apparently the Border Patrol needs a couple writers. Here’s a sample of a paragraph from one of their press releases. It’s pretty bad:

On April 23, 2018, Border Patrol agents assigned to the Laredo Sector Marine Unit rescued two subjects in distress found struggling to stay afloat in the Rio Grande River near Zacate Creek. The two subjects were pulled on board the marine vessel and treated by an Emergency Medical Technician. The two subjects were determined to be from the country of Mexico.

Here’s a link to an article about some of the edits that this paragraph needs. Before you click the link, do an edit yourself, then see what the writer of the article came up with. (I’m resisting the temptation to do it myself.)

https://cis.org/North/Border-Patrol-Needs-Few-Good-Writers